It is easy to get caught in certain routines or responses within a family that are not entirely helpful. But then we keep doing them because that is what we have always done. In the 7 habits of highly effective people by Stephen Covey one of the most important is ‘sharpening the saw’. Taking some time out of our busy lives to actually look at those habits and routines that we have got into and evaluate how they help (if they help) and if not make a plan to do something different. On example might be that when the kids come out of school they always fall out. Is there anything that could be done differently? Instead of getting straight in the car to go home, which you know ends in a big argument, who gets in the car first, who gets to talk first about their day, who runs to the car first – you get the idea! All of which can take a lot of time! What about a trip to the park for 10 minutes to run off steam! What about singing or dancing or being daft with the kids on the way to the car getting some laughter going and releasing the tension from the day. Including yours! Often at the end of a long day these are hard to do but some times weighing up managing an argument or throwing yourself into song can be liberating! We may do both and that’s ok too!